It took me a long time to realize it, but I'm totally burnt out. I've busted my ass and tried incredibly hard to be a good boss (not owner, I'm a low level middle manager–more a supervisor TBH) and I've realized that the harder we work, the worse off we are in the long run.
We're currently short staffed and I keep telling my crew, “We're off when scheduled, win, lose, or draw,” because I've realized that this is like the Pentagon and the Budget. They'll intentionally blow their budget when the Fiscal Year is almost up so that it doesn't get cut, and I'm intentionally blowing the KPIs because we're not fucking staffed for it and I'm tired of doing three people's jobs and asking each of them to do three people's jobs too.
We'll do what we can with what we've got, but I'm not going to keep killing myself (or asking them to kill themselves) to make metrics that don't fucking matter to anyone except somebody rich enough to own dozens (plural) of Fast Food Franchises. What's the worst they do? Fire me? Everywhere else is hiring, super short-staffed, and desperate for people to even just apply.
It occurred to me this evening that this is the only sensible thing to do when our team of five had two call outs on a Friday night and my boss kept pushing to hustle, hustle, hustle. Fuck that. We're fucking tired. We're overworked. It's so damn hot that I personally had symptoms of heat exhaustion. Fuck ruining myself as a person for somebody else's profits, and that is exactly what I've been doing: Ruining myself. I don't have hobbies anymore. I don't have interests. I don't have aspirations. I literally just go to work, watch mindless shit on Netflix until I sleep, rinse, repeat, and that's no way to live.
I don't think I'll ever stop being burnt out, but I'll be damned if I keep being the reason other people feel how I do.