I studied for years to be an actor then a director then an artist then a game designer. When i finally finished education i was left with the impossible task of getting a job as an artist in the game’s industry. This brought me to today where i have my first full time job in IT creating forms every day from 8am to 4pm. By all accounts this is a “good job” people are nice and the pay is good, there is just one problem, i hate it.
I cannot stand waking up early logging into a laptop and mindlessly creating forms from the morning until the night and that creative spark I have is killing my happiness slowly!
I started streaming on twitch as an outlet for me as i had always wanted to be an entertainer, i had just gone down a weird entertainment path that lead me to nothing.
I love it, genuinely love it, I have a small community at this point and streaming a few times a week and trying to entertain them has brought me a lot of joy. I am now in a horrible situation where I hate my job but i love my new “hobby” so much that i really want to try and make it a career.
Every work day kills me and leaves me feeling that I genuinely wasted my time, but streaming gives me this sense of purpose. Hopefully it goes somewhere because working for a soulless corporation is crushing my spirit!
TLDR: I needed a place to vent, hopefully you guys understand. Work killing me slowly streaming keeps the fire burning.