DISCLAIMER: I am fully aware how poorly I handled this. It was my first job, I was young, and very stupid. My coworkers were all 30-40+ so I had a very “trust the adults” kind of mindset. Also I have mental health issues that make it hard for me to set boundaries or tell when I’m being taken advantage of, possible ASD but not diagnosed yet. I wanted to vent about it because I’m sure this still happens to people like me all the time. I would never allow something like this to happen to me now, but it’s something crazy to look back on.
I have been kicking myself over this job for years and wanted to share how I allowed myself to be taken advantage of at work when I was 18. It was my first job and I had no idea none of this was normal – even though now it seems like common sense. I’m going to exclude any personal beefs I had with my coworkers but there were plenty. Serious sexual harassment, verbal abuse, threatened physically a couple times, etc… I’ll leave it at that.
I was one of two assistant managers working under the general manager. The other AM was the fiancée/mother of GM’s children. Because they had kids and I did not, and GM got a salary check regardless of hours worked, I was scheduled 80-100 hours a week while they barely worked any shifts at all. I tried going to the district manager about this but surprise! he was the other AM’s father! I didn’t see friends or family for the year I worked there. Worked every holiday, missed any social event, whatever.
While I was working 5-6 16 hour shifts a week I was given zero breaks. No fifteens, no lunch, nothing. I was also intentionally scheduled alone so bathroom breaks were few and far between. I pissed myself three times at work – miraculously didn’t get a UTI.
AM and GM regularly stole hundreds of dollars from the safe and fudged the numbers. Corporate caught on and I was blamed. I was put on a probationary period and if the money came up short again I would be fired. My solution to this was to run over to the ATM across the street and withdraw money from my account to add back to the safe so I wouldn’t get fired. Makes me ill thinking about it now.
One of our delivery drivers’ car broke down. We were short staffed and he was the only driver on the schedule. My GM came in and pressured me into signing a form allowing this employee to use my car. I signed the form. This driver and I worked the same shifts so this went on for a while. He started smoking weed in my car (on the job) and it REEKED. I was furious and told him I didn’t want him driving it anymore. My manager said I couldn’t do that. Later that week the driver smashed the entire side of my car against a cement wall. Finally, that was reason enough for me to “get” my car back. No damages were paid, to be fair it was a 95’ chevy I paid $800 for so wasn’t really worth it.
As I mentioned, the GM hardly worked. One weekend he was supposed to be my relief. He showed up two hours late the first day, the second day four hours late. The district manager stopped by unannounced and saw me working with my 40+ hours overtime (which had become a problem recently) and demanded to know why I was there and not his son-in-law. I told him the truth and he left. Later I got a call from my GM demanding I come back to work to talk. I lived 5 minutes away so I did. He blew up on me for telling the DM he was late two days in a row and that he was being reprimanded for not working enough after they took a look at his hours. He said if I pulled anything like that again he would fire me. I didn’t even stand up for myself just cried and went home.
As I said above, my OT was becoming a problem. I was required to work off the clock a lot to cut down in my OT hours.
I could keep going but those are the big things that always leave me feeling so much regret and anger for not doing anything. Just wanted to vent about it even if it makes me look like a big idiot.