ill try to be brief, but i might rant – i have a lot on my mind.
basically, ever since my new manager started at my job, she hasnt had my back. for context, ive only been working here for 3 months, and with my manager for 2.
my manager is standoff-ish and rant-y. normally i wouldn’t have a problem with this, but i feel like she doesn’t like working with me. when i made a decent mistake about my schedule a month ago (thought i was supposed to come in 2 hours later than i was actually meant to and missed work because of it), she lost any respect for me, and now i feel like she doesn’t trust me with anything.
because she doesn’t trust me, i don’t trust her not to get mad at me if i fuck up, and with my anxiety and parental issues i think everything i do could be fucking up! so i basically avoid talking to her whenever i can help it because she scares me.
problem is i think it’s getting in the way of my work, because if i don’t know something a customer asks i will assume based on context clues instead of ask her, just in case if i do ask she calls me a moron. and i will just say the wrong thing sometimes! ill be wildly incorrect! and then i have to be called out on it because my mouth went ahead of my brain!
it doesnt help that if she chews me out she frames it in the way of “she doesnt want to get in trouble with her manager” and then it makes me feel super guilty
i would also like to note that i have another coworker who is above me in standing, and i face NONE of these problems with her. shes nice and friendly, and has never gotten really mad at me – she just tells me what i did wrong, and we move on! its great! shes lovely! i just wish i could have that same level of patience with my manager.
should i talk to my manager about this? im still really scared shes going to belittle me, but i also dont want to leave work everyday i work with her expecting a panic attack when i get home
(oh, and if it helps, i dont think i could be fired if i tried. the turnover rate has been nuts for january (mostly due to my manager’s boss, go figure) so the company basically cant lose anyone rn)