Hey guys, so I made a new post because I wasn't sure how far my story was bumped down on the subreddit and people have been asking for an update. Last I updated I mentioned how my manager would look into that money for me. While he was doing that, I made an entire excel spreadsheet that broke down how much commission I would make yearly at the current rate and I used the previous year's data to compare with. I broke it down into minimum, maximum, and average wage expectations. Basically, I wanted to see how everything looked on paper and what I would want to request from my manager.
I emailed my manager asking for him to come over to my desk when he was free. I popped out the spreadsheet (which totally caught him off guard lol) and told him that this is the percentage that he would have to give me in order to match my other offer. He scoffed and said, “nobody gets paid like that in the whole dealership”. I told him that it sounds like I am overqualified for the job then.
He mentioned how everyone liked me there and it would be sad to see me go as I was a good worker and that I'm young and have so much potential within the company. He mentioned that he sees me as being a future manager like himself. We finally found a way to get me close to the number but it was still roughly $10,000 off.
Redditors, I'm not perfect and I regret doing it but, I took the bait. He had convinced me to stay. He said that he would have to swing it by his higher up but that it was doable.
I went home that night kind of feeling defeated so I kept going over the numbers and weighing the options of staying vs going. I really wanted to make it work as I love the people I directly work with and they had state-of-the-art equipment which was a total nerdgasm. I finally got my fiancé involved in going over the difficult decision. (which I totally should have done earlier – stupid me) We went over everything from the commute, work hours, responsibilities, pay, work environment, etc. My fiancé finally convinced me that I was about to get a raw deal.
The next day I went to work and actively searched for my boss so I could talk to him about my decision. I finally found him and asked if he had spoken with the higher up yet and he said he was going to meet him in about an hour regarding my pay. I told him that I thought about everything and unfortunately unless I can get what I requested that I was still going to take the other offer.
He was frustrated and started bad-mouthing the company I was going to. (I have no idea how he knew where I was going. I never told anyone I worked with where I was going and I did not put the dealership as a reference as I have only been there a relatively short time.) Honestly, the stuff he was saying was borderline manipulative behavior trying to get me to reconsider which I noticed right away. (and in hindsight he was doing this type of stuff all along subtly)
He kept saying things like, “well if that's really what you want to do.” and “it's your call but you're wasting a good opportunity leave here” and “[competitor] will go bankrupt within and year and then where will you be?” I kind of just stopped him in his tracks and said “You're right, the grass may not be greener on the other side, but there's only one way to find out.” I also said that “it's too much money on the line to not give it a shot.” I then reminded him that my last day will be in a few days (the original date I gave him).
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Overall Reddit, that was one of the most difficult decisions I have ever had to make. I have a future wedding to plan for and a house to eventually buy. It's all worth taking a leap of faith. I've learned my worth and to not settle for less.
Thank you r/anitwork again for hearing me out and giving me a place to vent and get my thoughts out there. You all have been super amazing and if you find yourself going down the same path I did then please take a page from my book and know your worth and don't let yourself get bullied by someone who makes significantly more than you.
TLDR: Got all my ammunition together to make a good decision about how much I should ask for raise-wise. Manipulative-Manager convinced me to stay for less than the asking price. Hero-fiancé had me see reason. Told the manager that I know my worth and won't settle for less. He tried to manipulate again but I shut that shit down. My last day is this Friday.