Let me preface this by saying I'm not anti-work, I'm anti-exploitation. I'm a material and capitalistic person by nature, but as a work/slave who's been busting his arse since he was fifteen – that's twenty-five years so far – under the promise of “if you work hard you can enjoy these good things too”.
I've come to realise that it shouldn't take a quarter of a fucking century to get literally nowhere except further in debt and I still don't have a home to call my own. I'm still renting. They keep moving the goal posts and it's made it nigh on impossible from the start to buy anything.
And if you have kids? Forget it.
I've moved from job to job going “above and beyond” every single time to show how reliable and competent I am, only for the most part to be shafted in one way or another.
I spent six years on dairy farms. $13 an hour.Two years in the timber industry at the mill. Paid well, toxic workplace.Two years “managing” a store for $16hr.A lump of time doing spot jobs as a labour hire for a pittance.Two and a half years at an electronics company that was otherwise a good place to be but the pay sucked and I needed more.A year at a truck manufacturing plant and not once did I get a performance review or an offer for full time. I saw people who started months after me go full time, and they lagged out on the job and never turned up on overtime days they elected for, when I did. A lot of ass-licking was needed there apparently.Currently working in another facility in manufacturing close to home and while I don't hate it, I have come to realise that I'm just a cog in the machine that makes one person rich.
Amongst all this I have set up and sort of “failed but not really invested enough into” a PC repair business (that also included sales of new machines) that really didn't take off but fill in some holes for some time.
I'm also currently doing Amazon Flex which to be fair pays well for the short amount of time I am actually working. I can make upwards of $40 an hour, and finish the block much faster than the time allocated. Sadly on its own it's not enough unless I get the right blocks and work seven days a week. I don't mind being a courier. There's a lot of in and out of a vehicle but I'd rather do that than stand and grind. I also don't have to elect a block if I don't want to, and I have nobody to answer to. If I wake up feeling like shit one day, I cancel the block and go back to sleep. Done.
I've restarted my PC business because it's also something I can do on my own terms.
My partner has a business idea about to get moving too so I'd like to put time and energy into this so we can then make money on our own terms.
I have a resignation letter written and about to send. Of course I have expenses like everyone else, but I'm struggling with the internal guilt that pitches me against the indoctrination I was raised with. “Get a career, buy a house, get married have kids, stay loyal and retire and enjoy two weeks holidays in the Bahamas every year.” Fuck off. I can barely afford a trip out of town to see my Dad let alone take time off work at all and fly to the motherfucking Bahamas!
Tell me I'm not crazy? Tell me this is the right decision?