Hello everybody. I want you to imagine something for me. Imagine you're calling out of work sick.
How did it make you feel? Anxious? Scared? Frustrated?
One of the beautiful things about getting older is confidence and assertiveness. If you have older colleagues, you might notice they don't get the same amount of nonsense that younger colleagues get. I believe at least part of that is thay managers know the older ones are more self assured and less bullyable. The young inexperienced ones get treated poorly under the assumption that they'll take it because they don't know better.
I need you all to understand something. In a professional situation, respect works both ways. If you say you can't come in and you get pressured, you're entitled to calmly say you aren't coming in and it's the end of the conversation. You're selling your services to someone. You aren't “getting into trouble” or “getting yelled at” if your employer treats you poorly. You arent a schoolchild any longer. You are experiencing a disagreement with a customer. You're entitled to put your foot down. If that triggers a 'review of the contract'you have with your employer' (I.e. if they threaten you) then so be it. Your customer is your boss and your labour is the product. The relationship works both ways.
I encourage everyone to be unreactive, unemotional and completely professional. Act like a business execitive. SAY no as a statement. Don't ASK no like a request. The difference is huge. It's a fairly safe bet that you'll continue to have gainful employment after you treat yourself with respect – look at your older colleagues for proof of this.
On the other hand, you aren't at war with your employer. Don't seek a fight, just seek the terms of your contract with neutral professional behaviour and language. It's the best way to assert your authority, in my experience.
Remember, you teach others how to treat you.
What if they just don't respect your boundaries no matter how professional you are? Well, again, think like an executive who has a troublesome client. What's the right way to deal with it? Obviously it depends exactly on your situation but if you are able to state exactly what you need, in calm assertive language, and compromise where you feel able to, then that is the foundation of a deal. Don't compromise beyond your means, and feel free to walk away from the deal if your client isn't respecting the terms of your agreement. You're all worthy and you're all deserving of good treatment. Bad management only persists when we let it. We all need to assertively make it clear we will not tolerate abuse. Always remember the terms of engagement favour the employer – you cost them less than they make from you. They need to employ you on terms you find agreeable. If they aren't willing to do that then you must walk away and find other employment. Their loss is higher than your loss if you walk, purely on a monetary basis. Realistically you may suffer more so obviously weigh up your own situation, but please don't tolerate abuse. Teach others to treat you well.