Honestly, for me, work itself isn't the main issue. I do agree that 45+ hours a week is fucking ridiculous, but if you told me I could just show up, get my work done, and go home, I could do that. That's how my last job was – I worked at a doctor's office and didn't have to fake some sickening personality, I just got to do all the admin work and not pretend to be someone I wasn't. No performance reviews, no dumb projects. However, I couldn't afford to live on the pay from that job, so I took a corporate job 5 months ago.
In this role I have to work with a lot more people and help manage different projects. I get two performance reviews a year, and am expected to “take initiative!” and “be proactive!” by coming up with / leading different projects to help improve the company processes. The problem is I don't give two fucks about the company. I just want to be told what to do and have actual work to get done, rather than the vague “take ownership, be a leader!” bullshit. I'm literally gonna be dead in 80 years and I'm expected to be passionate about a fucking corporation.
I feel like I'm playing pretend and just pulling stupid ideas out of my ass. I'm sitting in an office with a bunch of arrogant corporate dumb-asses who think they're so smart and important – I just want to look at them and be like “people are starving, we're in a pandemic, and climate change is ravaging the planet. We aren't contributing a fucking thing to this world and you aren't making the difference you think you're making.”
Every day I have the fucking dumbest conversations with people that make me lose brain cells. One woman in particular makes me want to rip my hair out – she comes up with the most stupid, complicated ideas and then hands them to be to lead. She has a disgustingly fake positive personality and I just want to smack her.
Sorry, anger issues coming out there at the end lmfao. I promise I will not use violence, just needed to get that off my chest. I also acknowledge that many people have much greater struggles than I do, and I'm very privileged. I just wanted to let out some of my frustrations.