I am a senior management level professional, I was sent this EA job (dressed up as a COS role) by a recruiter on Linkedin because I am a youngish female, I guess. These “key attributes” follow with multiple grammar issues. If this actually came from a Series E company as claimed, that is just pathetic.
Putting in bold the most hilarious parts. I responded that I had questions about the bullet points and recruiter ghosted. I was totally ready to troll. Look at these written expectations and tell me this is not toxic. Also, the CEO clearly knows nothing about basic business sense or writing. It is clear that this set of demands is clearly coming directly from the CEO's mouth.
Key Attributes:
● Ability to get the job done: you are high achieving, results-driven, and tenacious. You will find a way no matter what to finish what is asked of you**,** even and especially when the task is challenging. You are the sort of person who has very high professional integrity and won’t leave the desk until you find a way to accomplish whats in front of you.
● Emotional intelligence: you are perceptive toward the CEO and other key relationships and know how to develop respect in an organization.
● Loyal and selfless: you are humble enough to work behind the scenes, and by nature you are extremely loyal.
● Extremely organized project manager- You are known for creating order out of chaos, you project plan and consistently looks ahead and anticipate needs before they arise. You are a productivity nut, you have insanely detailed and perfectionist tendencies when it comes to tracking projects and progress; coordination does not phase you.
● Highly agile and adaptable: same day deliverables are your jam; you can spin 180 degrees in a second if it means meeting the needs of the CEO. [BAHAHAHA! CEO with a God-complex]
● Hard Working, Dedicated, and Passionate: this is not a Monday-to-Friday, 9-to-5 role. The CoS role comes with an incredible opportunity to glimpse into how CEO at a series E company operates [looks like CEO can't write a decent job description that is grammatically correct or business appropriate, but thinks he's God] and will require hard work. You are the kind of person who loves working, you are passionate about it [passionate about spinning 180 and not leaving the desk]. You’re the kind of person who works evenings and weekends simply because you are excited and dedicated, and you can’t imagine it any other way [hahahahaha].
● Data driven: you are skilled with reviewing and summarizing research and data sets quickly to present research
If someone knows this company, please out them. Linkedin recruiter withheld the name but I am dying to know.