Yeah ^ all of that. I’ve always worked in retail, until a recent (one month) stint working as an Administrative Assistant for a Real Estate Photography company. Over the last 3 years, mostly due to my stubborn stance of NEVER taking an insult unwarranted by employers, I’ve had 7 different jobs (some at the same time as others, some for 2 days… some for 9 months. You get the gist. I was not easily satisfied.). I kept encountering bosses that would either promise wages (and then never actually follow-up), verbally abuse me (to tears, multiple times), and gaslight me for being in shambles because of all of it. At the same time making like less than $12/h for a majority of the time.
But anyways, just context.
I’ve always tried to do my BEST in my job. I’ve had the same sh*thead employers call me back & beg me to return to my position. (Which, no thanks). I’ve had customers from 2 years prior remember my name & face @ another job and SPECIFICALLY request my help. I was always really proud of being able to understand and help customers as much as I could. But, I’ve reached a low point that I don’t know how to get out of.
If it tells you anything, I lost that Administrative Assistant position when I said that “I would appreciate it if you spoke to me more kindly, since I am putting in the energy to organize and streamline your file system” (which was a mixture of 80+ different Dropbox files, an Excel sheet with 2,000+ cells to keep their customer information – and half of it wasn’t up to date, and their Google drive) when he responded to each of my – very reasonable- questions with “you should have more attention to detail than that”. He said that I “talk back too much” and fired me the SAME day. Meanwhile, he was verbally abusing his wife while she sat on Zoom training me FOR him. God, I have just entirely lost hope in this.
A little about me.
I’m a published author, with 5+ years of experience in photography, graphic design, and publishing. These pursuits have been more of a a hobby for the most-part, until I finally published my first personal novel in early 2021. It performed a lot better than I expected, and I’ve had success in other parts of my life because of it. After leaving my worst job (mid-2021), and working on projects again, the difference I felt was SO vast. I never feel as involved or happy as I do when I’m letting my mind create. Accordingly, I vowed to myself that I wouldn’t sucker myself into a another local job that pays close to dirt, and pummels my self-respect into nothingness. I’ve been trying SO hard, but I am so close to complete breakdown that I can’t even begin to think about what to do. Money is running low, stress is running high, and nobody is interested in creative experience that doesn’t come with a degree.
Other creatives, what helped you in your darkest moments when looking for your “ideal” job? Like, the ones that actually appreciate your skill and hard work. Any helpful resources, advice, or just nice words are welcomed :,)
I’ve been feeling so small lately.
I hardly ever turn to public forums for advice, but I’ve been quietly interacting with this group for some time, and I see a lot of others struggling with the same sense of hopelessness.