My mom is actually a former union officer of the suburban school district where she worked. She has a pension and full healthcare coverage, courtesy of the union. She moved to a small rural lake town when she retired.
About 10 years ago, she met and quickly married this guy who has never lived anywhere else, owned a small business in town, and is a racist conservative asshole. I met him once before they got married. Needless to say, I don't get along with him at all, and unfortunately, he's changed my mom.
Soon after arriving at their house, he started talking about how “nobody wants to work” and the younger generation is all “lazy.” I told him I don't think they're lazy. I think they're disillusioned and rebelling against a system that doesn't benefit them.
His proof is that the local fast-food restaurant has a sign up that says, “Now hiring up to $21/hr.” He's convinced that they're offering high school kids $21 to work there and still can't find enough employees. There's nothing you can say to convince him otherwise.
He also likes to talk about how “hard-working” his two grandsons are (19 and 14). And they are great kids… But they'll have their first car bought for them as soon as they need one. They'll have their college educations completely covered for them with no student loans. They'll always have a job at the family business that they'll inherit one day. They have every social safety net, so they can work hard with the security that they can only fail upwards.
By contrast, my partner was born outside the U.S., the youngest of 13 kids. His parents passed away when he was 9, so his oldest brother raised him. His brother falsified his age so he could join the military at 16. Then he tested high enough in math and science to get a scholarship. He moved to another country where he didn't speak the language and earned B.S., M.S. and PhD degrees.
He now speaks 4 languages, works about 70 hrs a week, is a U.S. citizen, and has top government security clearance for the work he does. My stepdad loves making fun of his imperfect English and makes comments about him being “just off the banana boat,” even though he's been in the U.S. for over 20 yrs.
I pointed out to my stepdad that his college education was 90% subsidized by the state, that he came of age in the era of strong unions, affordable housing and transportation, and that he'll have guaranteed social security, not to mention that he now also gets my mom's primo healthcare coverage. I said it's not ethical that corporations pay employees slave wages while they bonus themselves 7 figures, and that's when he shouted at me, “BULLSHIT! They made the investment and took the risk! They deserve it!”
There's no reasoning with these people. My partner and I decided we aren't going to visit them any more as long as he's there. My mom is welcome to visit us without him.