The title says it all but I just got laid off from my job 2 weeks ago & don't have enough money for rent in June, yet I can't bring myself to apply to another job. Im anti work like you can't believe but haven't been able to find a way to survive without working. I feel exhausted though because most every job I lost was due to discrimination or the wages bring too low for me to be able to afford rent. I'm an artist by trade & have been trying to establish myself as a working artist for over a decade but have had no luck. What its come down to is I don't have the social skills to get a job or stay in a job thats a good fit because I have ADHD, autism, & learning disabilities that has deemed me unfavorable in many jobs or unqualified.
After this recent layoff due to discrimination & refusal of my employer to accommodate what I was asking for, ive been wary of applying for any jobs remotely similar, especially since ive been through 16 of them in such a short amount of time. Its not normal to go through so many jobs in less than 5 years and I can't risk going through that again- its extremely traumatic & sabotages my mental health with every layoff! I'm not a bad employee- I'm just too socially weird & too cognitively slow for most employers to want to deal with. I don't have the social currency needed to be able to do well in any job.
At this point I'm just trying to find a way to pay bills & survive while I figure out what to do next & explore the option of starting my own business as am artist so I can make and sell my art for a living. But ive discovered that almost all of the mutual aid and emergency aid resources dried up or no longer exist from 2020 & ive been having trouble finding much else. I'm trying to apply for unemployment to buy me some more time but I'm yet to know whether im going to receive any. When not researching emergency fund options ive been spending the rest of my time working on art work- my goal is to have a collection of items ready to sell at a local marker starting in September, which I think is a reasonable goal. I'm just worried that I don't qualify somehow doe unemployment or won't be able to find emergency funds to help me make rent in June. I'm very worried. I don't have the mental capacity to work another shit customer service job where I have no rights and everything is cut throat.
I guess I was wondering if you all has any advice or know of any emergency fund/mutual aid resources for low income disabled folk like myself. I was rejected from disability because they didn't think I was disabled enough to qualify. I guess not being able to hold onto a job and going through 16 in 4.5 years doesn't count? I'm at a loss for what to do. Its like US society wants me to end up homeless & then dead. I get so mad when I hear people say I should ask for help but nobody says where or who to talk to. Unless I've missed something, it seems as though help does not exist.
Any advice or recommendations are greatly appreciated. I'm really scared & really burnt out. I haven't even mentioned how much these jobs have sabotaged my mental health over the years & how amazingly, ive felt better the last two weeks ive been unemployed than I have in a decade. I feel like I can breathe & actually fucking rest & take care of myself. I don't have any money but being able to be at home and rest has been so incredibly magical & very much needed. I need help though with rent and bills, so anything, anything anyone could point me towards for mutual funds or emergency grants would be greatly appreciated.