So this was a fun experience. I requested an accommodation and submitted the appropriate paperwork signed by my doctor. FMLA is not available. Prior to requesting the accommodation I attempted to identify other options that would hopefully be easier and less frustrating on everyone. Denied. Submit accommodation paperwork; that is denied with a vague reason. There are others who do have this accommodation; that is important to note. Cool. Message received.
This is a reminder to ALWAYS keep your resume updated, keep your options open and remember that your job does not actually care about you.