TL;DR, unemployed since the end of last year and am struggling to get any calls back despite constant effort. Feeling very discouraged. How am I supposed to find a job when everything seems so terrible and predatory?
First big text post in a bit so this may be sloppy but, I’m looking for support/advice.
I am a 21 year old college dropout attempting to get back into the work force. I initially joined the “working world” at 18 as a grocer for over a year. Being 18 I was still looking for a career path and potential college options though so I knew I wouldn’t be staying there. Even though I knew that, I still did 110% and became a sort of unofficial team lead and very much enjoyed the work while helping direct new hires.
After my cool manager retired and the whole team dynamic fell apart I decided my focus would be education, specifically early child care. So I found a daycare in town to try and get some direct experience with kids before filling out all the college stuff. Worked there for around the same amount of time as my last job before getting everything in order and going to college full time.
The environment at the daycare was definitely not something I wanted to be part of but I didn’t realize until after leaving. I was the only man in the whole building and I’m sure you can imagine how that worked out.
Over the course of the summer I was put into multiple potentially dangerous situations that would not have been if I was a woman, each ending in verbal berating and shaming by a coworker and then meetings with the heads of the daycare. Compounded with my (at the time) unmedicated ADHD, and trauma stemming from verbal abuse and strict parenting (which each confrontation triggered), my experience there has caused me immense anxiety. I loved working with those kids but, it was a terribly frustrating place to be in and I found it hard to connect with any of my coworkers even before the summer as they were all boomers. It was a fun and engaging place that turned very quickly to a hostile and stressful environment.
I dropped out of college as my mental health was very quickly deteriorating and I could not keep up with my studies. I left around mid May this year and have only just started to see a therapist and get medicated.
Every time I look at Indeed or am shown company sites, I’m overwhelmed or extremely hesitant to pursue because I’m sure that it will be a hostile place and I will be treated poorly.
I know I should probably bring this up with my therapist but, I wanted to see if anyone had any suggestions or similar experiences overcoming this fear of hostility.
Ive been looking for a job for the past two months but I’m rarely even getting rejection emails. Is no one taking me because I’ve been unemployed so long? My resume is very eloquently and intentionally written.
Man, this was such a messy wall of text.I’m willing to elaborate on anything that doesn’t make sense. If this breaks any rules feel free to delete.