I've been reading this subreddit for about a year and you guys have helped me a lot. Knowing that it wasn't my fault really helped me go through a 3-month anxiety period due to stress. So I was hoping my story can help some people realise their own value. There we go:
I'm a Spanish guy from a little town and I arrived in Barcelona following the love of my life. I reached a job at a big American company based in the city, it was great for me because apart from some private lessons I used to give as a teacher I had barely any experience. I stayed there for about 1 year and became the “perfect worker”; took my breaks at the scheduled time, no delays when arriving, overperformed my colleagues… this led to getting offered a raise (nothing too crazy in salary but the responsibilities were different, it was more about the status, it was as a trainer).
They assigned me there to this 50 y.o. ish guy who seemed a really nice guy but ended up turning into a maniac who was literally talking shit about everyone every time we talked to anyone. He also tried to extort me and make me pay for his coffees as he was “out of money” one week after being paid. I was really out of money as I had just paid some expenses for my master and I really couldn't afford to pay someone's coffee+sandwich each fucking day so I ended up not joining the rest of the team for lunch (I said I wanted to prepare the next session we were about to have).
By the time it was obvious we were not really getting along he had sent a massive report about me not being valid for the position and recommending my demotion. I had basically spent a whole summer learning pages of new content he wanted me to memorise and say in literally the exact same way they were written for 8 hours a day. So I was working for 8 hours a day providing training and then going back home to memorise the content for the next day (the whole training I had to deliver lasted for a month and I had to do that twice as a test).
My results with the trainees were 10/10, full satisfaction from the class and all of them were working at an unprecedented pace. But still, the guy didn't like me and I got demoted. I went back into my original position, humiliated.
I found another job at a small design school, as an academic orientator. The ambience seemed different, more relaxed and the ppl were nice. Unfortunately, right after joining everyone warned me about this colleague of mine, she used to be a big thing in the company but now had the same position as me (not the same salary though). As far as I could tell she was just a little “old style” and a bit nosy but that was it. Through the first year, I got offered the possibility of growing and becoming an international rep for the company, travelling a lot and making a ton of money. I was euphoric. Nevertheless, the pandemic stroke and all the good things the company was providing me were not there anymore.
Everyone was in a bad mood, my colleagues didn't wanna talk to other departments and I was the only one available so my 9-6 job ended up in a 9-12 (15h) all in the same room, taking all the workload no one else was willing to do because I was young (about 20 years diff on average), sometimes doing online events from 2 AM to 4 AM (due to the time diff with LATAM), my possible promotion was not there any more, in fact, as a significant part of my salary was made in commissions (which we were not doing any more) I couldn't even afford to move into an apartment with my GF. Long days, same old apartment (shared with other 10 ppl). I didn't wanna fuck up my relationship and on top of everything they were screwing up the only thing I could enjoy: my holidays.
This happened twice. The first time, this colleague of mine was ranting on me, telling this to the GM, VP and my direct manager as I was not willing to come back earlier from my holidays to allow her to have dinner with her kid who was leaving the city to study abroad. The reason was that I was on fucking JAPAN (we had been saving since we arrived at the city and she made everything possible to make me feel miserable and it almost worked), she really pushed it saying “hey you don't have kids, you could change your flight and come a day or two earlier” when I told her that would be 3K€ shw didn't see that as a problem.
The second time I was with my family at the beach for 2 weeks (this was months after underpayment, overworking and basically them trying to find any excuse to blame it on me, almost making it seem as if the pandemic was my bad ) during this time they tried to call me but I was not having it. I decided to not pick up the phone. They blasted it (about 40 calls each day for about 3 days) my boss texted me to my personal email saying that I needed to pick it up, as it was a life or death matter. It was to tell my colleague the location of a contract ON HER FUCKING EMAIL. She found it but made it seem as if it was my bad.
After this and many other similar things I was constantly stressed and I felt something I had never felt before as if I was sort of drugged, kinda numb. At some point every day I was working I woke up fine, and I ended up crying every single day for no apparent reason. I wasn't able to have an erection and I couldn't do anything right, I was anxious about leaving my room. I didn't wanna go on sick leave as I'd feel guilty about the rest of the team would have to cope with my clients (the targets were for all of us).
I went to my doctor and she immediately told me she had never seen a case like that in someone in his twenties. I was triggering every single indicator for stress and anxiety. She said medication was not appropriate as it was something psychological therapy could fix. On the other hand, my companies doctor (you have to attend by Spanish law) were directly offering me medication to get back to work immediately. This ended up in my doctor fighting for me (thankfully) and setting a 3months sick leave. I was able to use this time wisely, found an amazing therapy that helped me to believe in myself, and learn to stand my ground.
A couple of weeks after my sick leave was over my company fired me. Little did they know, I had just been offered a new job, so instead of having to give my two weeks' notice I enjoyed 2 weeks of holidays, they paid me as it was an “unjustified firing”(I don't really know how to translate this into English) and now I have a job with twice the pay, higher position, amazing conditions and a great young vibrant team.
DON'T LET THEM USE YOU, DON'T LET THEM CRUSH YOUR WILL
PS: We found another apartment 🙂