I tried to request off a week ago, but the earliest date available to even request was, the 21st I think. It’s dumb, because I know the schedule wasn’t written yet.
I’m cool with working any other holiday. But V-Day? I hate this stupid “holiday”. It’s just commercialism for corporations to profit drain people.
If you’re in a relationship, you should love and take care of your partner EVERYDAY, not just one day of the calendar year.
Even Christmas is commercialized, but it at least has an important meaning behind it (both from a religious POV and not religious).
It’s bad enough having to see couples in a relationship on a daily basis, it hurts me. But an entire day ALL ABOUT IT???
At Kroger, they make everything a big deal. All it is for the corporation is about money, just like everything else. They want me there to help because it’s busy, guess what? I care more about myself than that, even though I hate myself and don’t really care about myself.
I don’t want to be around other people on that day, I want to lock myself in my room and be by myself.
They’ll probably want me to go help in that tent, to make things even worse. Weirdly it didn’t bother me the last few years (that I can remember) but I guess I was just still more hopeful that there was hope for me to have a loving girlfriend, and more hopeful about life in general.
I already told supervisor I have a doctor appointment on that day (I don’t). They said since the schedule is already written, I’d have to switch shifts with someone. The people I asked today already work on V-Day.
If I call in sick, they’ll know I’m faking now. If I stick to the “doctors appointment”, and insist I can’t go in, they might try to make me either come in for a few hours later, or provide a doctor note.
I hate that my life has even come to this point, I’m too old for this (job and life circumstances ending me up here) but exposing myself to all the people who can actually get into relationships won’t be some “exposure therapy” for me, it’ll only put me in a 1000x worse mindset and mood.
I really don’t even care if I get written up, I’ve never been written up and you get 3 before termination, right? I kind of want to be fired, but I just don’t know what I’d do next, so I’d really rather not get fired.
Like, if I call in or insist I CANNOT miss my doctor appointment, and I don’t provide a doctor note (unless my doctor can write one even though I’m not actually seeing them at this time) what’s the worst that’ll happen to me?
I’m trying to keep the concept of “romantic and sexual” relationships out of my mind, I’m trying to suppress my desire for that from any women, because I’m ugly and work at Kroger (bagging and pushing carts, even worse).
I seriously might have some kind of outburst or meltdown, it’s just too much to keep bottled up.
I don’t really care about this job that much, it’s dead end, for years on end they’ll keep you at the bottom, and there is really no level that is really great. I’d rather be dead anyway, I feel if I quit or get fired I might have to seriously be ready to end my life, because I can’t seem to do better and I can’t deal with the consequences, whether my situation is my fault or not.
I’m not just an employee, I’m an effing human being, even though I don’t really feel like one.