I (M, 34) recently became a department chair at a community college (by recent I mean 4 years but I still feel like it’s my first year on the job). Last year a faculty member asked to meet with me to discuss something important and she told me she was pregnant. I thought this was excellent news and congratulated her, and was surprised when she tearfully told me she was afraid she would lose her job due to being pregnant. She told me she hadn’t even told her family yet and that she thought I should know first so she knew what her options were.
I was floored. I didn’t know what to say. I promised her that we could work it out and that she didn’t have to worry about her position being in jeopardy because she was having a baby. I urged her to call her husband and tell him the news and celebrate the momentous occasion. One year later and mom and baby are both doing well, but I still think about her all the time and the fear that she felt for herself and her livelihood because she had gotten pregnant.
I shared my experience with some female colleagues and they all expressed their sentiments for my faculty member, each recounting their own experience of getting pregnant and fearing for their employment and livelihood. It was such an eye opening experience that I still think about it regularly to this day. I don’t know why I am sharing this, but I guess really it’s to say that I am sorry to all of you who ever have been made to feel fear instead of joy when learning that you are going to be a mother. This has struck me to my core and I will never forget it, and I will never make a woman feel afraid for herself or her family as long as I am in a position to offer this kind of support.