I hate my shitty job so much. I've become severely depressed, suicidal and lost interest in everything that used to bring me joy because of it. I no longer have any hobbies or do anything except for work, barely eat, barely sleep (insomnia) and get drunk out of depression.
I hate my job so much I simply see no point in living anymore. I have my suicide planned out if I dont see a way out.
I'm in the trades. I really hate manual work and I am terrible at it. I've always been the type to struggle a lot with physical activities, PE was my worst subject in high school and I still can't drive after 6 years of getting my licence. I hate manual labour so much.
When I ask people for advice on how to get out of it they just tell me that I have to do it which just reinforces my depression and is just a way of telling me they dont give a shit end up dead. I can't keep going like this….I really can't. I can't get used to it or improve and I don't want to do this job in the first place. But I'm out of options. STEM degrees seem too difficult and other jobs on my country do not pay a living wage.
I don't care about anything anymore. I would rather die than spend half of my life working a job I hate.