I worked PT in a college call center and they had started training me to do work to help cover my supervisor's vacations since the only FT employee had left 3 months ago and HR still hasn't approved the process of hiring a replacement.
I've also been getting “coached” at least once a week on complaints made against me by students who don't know dick about shit.
I've been pretty miserable because I do my absolute best to defuse situations and make people happy while I'm trying to help them. And it upsets me that my supervisor has been asking for my side of things and then just ignores what I say and tells me to try harder. I'm also only making a little more than a dollar per hour than when I started and inflation has made it so that my paycheck doesn't go as far as it used to.
So this morning we are finishing the supervisor task I was training on and my supervisor ends the session by bringing up an angry student from last Thursday. We had already discussed it on Thursday about how to improve going forward so bringing it up again just made me very anxious and sad. She iterated that this CAN NOT happen again but that she believed in me going forward. Well that killed what little motivation and love I had left for this job. I have NEVER done this job for praise, I liked helping people and I genuinely liked the people I worked with before they left. But hearing at least once a week about how I'm not trying hard enough has sapped all the joy from me.
I went back to my desk and finished my calls for the day in the same way that I have always done even though I had already told my supervisor I wasn't feeling well and wanted to leave early. I tried to soldier on but I just started crying at my desk and went to talk about it with my supervisor but they weren't in their office. I sat watching her office and waiting for an hour and in that time I became more and more angry and sad.
By the time she did come back, it was to call me into her office for the second supervisor task training for the day. She could see I had been crying and asked if I was ok. I broke down and told her that I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't be asked to train for being a key holder and supervisor without the title, pay, and respect that comes with such duties. I couldn't listen to her tell me about how I wasn't trying hard enough with aggressively stupid people over the phone when I have been giving my all. I could see her panicking and she asked me to sit down and talk it through with her. I obliged because I do like her as a person but as soon as we started getting into it she was called away by her boss and asked me to wait for her.
I got up and cleaned off my desk and carried the box to my car. I came back for some more items I had left behind and stopped to say goodbye to a friend. I started crying again and my supervisor and her boss walked up behind me.
Her boss opened with, “NAME if you're submitting your resignation you need to just do it and get on with it. You can't be carrying on like this, people have work to do. If you're resigning then you need to leave and HR needs to be called and so does campus police.”
My supervisor did not like that, she tried to walk back everything and say, “You can change your mind though, I meant everything I said about valuing you and believing in you.”
Me: “I'm not making a scene or carrying on, I'm just saying goodbye to FRIEND. I already said to SUPERVISOR that I don't do this job for praise, I give 100% and I'm still told it's not enough. My cup is empty. Have a nice day, ladies.”
So yeah, supervisor's boss had always been “nice” to me so it was a shock to hear something like that come out of her mouth. It just goes to show that at the end of the day the people at middle of the top truly don't give a shit about you.
If you read all of this, thank you.