Throwaway account just in case
Quitting my job has been something that I'd been thinking heavily about since the beginning of the year- actually, since October, but in January my boss said some inappropriate things to me (not sexual, just threatening my career with inappropriate language when I did something they didn't like, I won't go into specifics because I have a feeling it would be TOO specific) that just sat wrong. I'd already been miserable for so long because my office could easily be working from home 80% of the time but we weren't because of the boss's personal preference. We sit in a basement for 9 hours a day, when the work we DO get done takes MAYBE 3 or 4 hours. The rest of the time was just trying not to break down at my desk with nothing to do but not being allowed to leave. The one time I did try to leave early, a coworker snitched on me and I got a write up that went to HR. As anyone could probably imagine, wasting all this time in a basement and not seeing the sun had been doing some pretty heavy damage. Add to that daily anxiety attacks because I felt so incredibly trapped, was doing real, physical damage to my body. None of this even mentions the time and frustration wasted in rush hour traffic in a large city.
So yesterday I finally submitted the email I'd been drafting on and off for over a month. I blocked all the work numbers in my phone. I have some work items that need to be returned soon but I can easily do that without returning to the office.
And I gotta say. I went out for a walk today in the middle of the afternoon, the weather was gorgeous, and I literally sat down on a park bench and cried because I was so happy I was outside, in the sunlight, not sitting in a basement for 9 hours. I literally broke dwn crying from happiness. I guess I'm lucky in that I have another job lined up and have the means to float until it starts, and in the meantime am enjoying a few weeks off. It feels like a desperately needed reprieve. I don't even think my position was unnecessary- I know they'll struggle without me. But I could not physically or mentally care less. That place was actively destroying my mental and physical health and I hope they DO struggle. We all know they won't, but I hope they make the desperately needed changes that are so easy there that the boss has individually decided not to implement.
Please put yourself first, whatever that means for you. If anyone has any questions, I'll be happy to help. My new job is currently remote and I'm waiting to hear back from a fully remote position that pays twice as much as what I was making (in a highly skilled position that was, needless to say, wildly underpaid) to do important, non-profit work. Take care of yourself, and thanks for letting me get this all out.