I (22F) started my first job in a small, mostly male marketing company a few months ago. So far, I don’t like the work environment and I am planning to start looking once I reach a year here. I was desperate for employment but have realized coming into the office everyday is taking a serious toll on my mental and physical health, I have ankylosing spondylitis and my immune system is overactive. Small colds usually end in bronchitis or pneumonia for me and I have a lot of inflammation in my body…which has become more of an issue after starting this job, probably due to stress.
Anyways, my biggest issue is the sexism. I used to wear makeup to the office but I have had overhead some of the guys talking about me putting makeup on in my car, so apparently I’m being watched. One guy said something like “Oh, she is always here early but I see her putting makeup on in her car so I think her boyfriend or dad must not let her leave the house with it”. I noticed when I stopped wearing makeup, my older male boss who is in his 50’s stopped staring me up and down. I feel more confident now and less like a sex object. Normally, I love makeup and wear it around people my age and when I go out with friends but I feel like I have to tone myself down a lot in the office. I wear bland clothes and have made up a fake boyfriend to wear off assumptions and creeps. I feel like I am experiencing sexism because this stuff would not be said about a man. Additionally, a new female hire quit and attempted to sue the company over sexual harassment after my boss took her out to lunch alone. People refuse to tell me what happened or the details and I’m worried that I am around a creep without realizing the extent of it. We have an HR lady who works from home but she’s no help. She will participate in gossip too. She advises my boss to stop doing these things like having closed door meetings, but he ignores her and does it anyways.
I don’t know the best way out. I need to pay my bills but this job is not really for me it seems. I had another office job in college before this and my boss was verbally abusive. He would yell at me and call me stupid, that one was far worse. I left the office crying on several occasions and was very underpaid. I have had horrible experiences with bosses and every job I end up in seems to be awful. I have been trying to break into starting a home based business but it’s hard. I’m not totally sure of the direction I’m going in. I want to get a work from home job but haven’t been able to land one yet.