I work 8-10 hour shifts 5 days a week as a pharmacy tech and I come home exhausted, in pain from standing all day. My body is killing me, my sciatica is starting to get really bad (will be seeing a chiropractor and getting better shoes soon).
I sat down today to pay my bills and I'm seeing my credit card balances go higher and higher and I watch my paychecks cover less and less every pay period. I feel like I am in a grave, having dirt shoveled on me while I'm still alive. I feel like an animal backed into a corner. It doesn't seem to matter how many hours I work because so much is taken out in taxes. It doesn't matter how many of my belongings I sell on eBay to make a little extra cash. Rent is more than half of one of the only two paychecks I get in a month and my partner and I went with one of the cheapest places we could find. We routinely buy the same things and grocery shopping is about $10 more each time we go. I feel utterly hopeless and have had genuine thoughts of ending it all, although I don't really want to. I don't know what to do and I'm terrified. Terrified that this will be my life for 40 more years and then I'll die.