I’m mentally ill, with no money for treatment, I can’t find a job and my mother considered denying me food

I'm mentally ill, so anything requiring mental effort gives me immense pain. Also anything requiring physical effort gives me immense pain. I have been shamed and labeled as lazy and my mother wanted to deny me food. I don't know what to do. Edit: I'm in Russia. I think my mental illness is something unique because I also haven't seen any description of mental illness where thinking causes pain. Nobody believes me. Nobody takes it seriously. Everyone thinks I'm just lazy. But even thinking about work brings me literal physical pain. We don't have any money for health treatment.