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Antiwork

I’ve been so conditioned to beg for PTO I am unable to simply say “I need the day off today.”

For the first time in my long career I work for an organization that has repeatedly told me that if I need PTO and have the hours banked and my being gone won't interfere with a mission-critical deadline, I can request it. No questions asked. No lead time needed. Simply saying, “I'm taking the day off” is good enough. In spite of my boss reminding that I don't need to provide an explanation, I can't help myself. I always feel the need to explain myself. Why? Because for 30+ years I've worked for places that made me feel guilty for taking PTO. Countless replies that were basically, “If you're taking time off, you'd better have a good reason. We need you to blah, blah blah.” So basically I'm like a whipped puppy abused by my previous owner whose current owner isn't going to beat me for taking a shit on…


For the first time in my long career I work for an organization that has repeatedly told me that if I need PTO and have the hours banked and my being gone won't interfere with a mission-critical deadline, I can request it. No questions asked. No lead time needed. Simply saying, “I'm taking the day off” is good enough. In spite of my boss reminding that I don't need to provide an explanation, I can't help myself. I always feel the need to explain myself.

Why? Because for 30+ years I've worked for places that made me feel guilty for taking PTO. Countless replies that were basically, “If you're taking time off, you'd better have a good reason. We need you to blah, blah blah.” So basically I'm like a whipped puppy abused by my previous owner whose current owner isn't going to beat me for taking a shit on the floor. Like that pup, I cower in the corner because I've been conditioned to, even if my current master is full of kindness and understanding.

This is what working in America for more than three decades has reduced me to.

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