I have been so stressed and down recently with personal matters and work, I have been getting migraines, I constantly feel sick, I am over eating, over sleeping, my hair is falling out…. I have an appointment with the doctor tomorrow afternoon so will see what they say.
One issue I am having is the fact I was told I would be allowed time off for medical appointments (I am getting work done and need one appointment a month, my last being next month). I told them this at the interview and they agreed this is fine, no more than 3hrs at a time, which is fine. The last 2-3 months they have denied my time off 9/10 times with rubbish excuses like “you don't need x amount of time for an appointment” when I had proof the appointment was 1.5hrs and caused me to reschedule my appointments multiple times, which causes issues as my appointments are time sensitive and I can't have gaps too large between them.
I had a migraine and took a day off work as I work with computers, and got a passive aggressive message from my boss basically telling me off and it made me feel so guilty. I have also had other sick days as I am potentially chronically ill (diagnosis pending) & I am diagnosed with mental illnesses too. One of my colleagues is absolutely insufferable, they point the finger at me whenever there is a mistake made by anyone (and today they told me off for saying “I didn't do X, other colleague did it” when they blamed me for something again, saying about how I must always play the blame game and we are meant to be a team). This colleague also routinely insults me, basically saying I am stupid and useless all the time, is constantly rude and belittling to other colleagues, and I am too afraid to speak up as they have been here for over a decade and I have been here less than a year. Everyone excuses their toxic behaviour because that's just “how they are”. When they are nice they're lovely, when they are irritated by anything they are cruel.
The reason I am so stressed about potentially being signed off is that there are only 3 of us in my department, and the other 2 will each be taking 2 week holidays in the coming weeks. I know if I take even 30 seconds off they will be absolutely seething at me. I have dealt with lots of toxic situations in my life and I am not very good at sticking up for myself, especially when it comes to work. I feel so sick at the thought of being signed off as I know on my return I will be shunned, but the thought of spending even another day in this place makes me feel even sicker.
I do have a job interview lined up at the start of next month, so hopefully that goes well. The place I'm at is generally a fine place to work, but this employee and the jobs lack of prmised flexibility is causing friction.