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Antiwork

My manager asked me if I disliked him during my performance review

It happened a couple of months ago: I had my yearly performance review at my office job, and my manager point blank asked me: “I don't think you like me?” I fully blanked out at that moment, because what are you supposed to reply to that? What if I had replied “yes indeed I dislike you ;)”? This felt like such a weird thing to ask to your subordinate. Why do you care if I like you or not? As long as we work together well and I get my job done, why do you care? I babbled a reply around the lines of “oh no not at all, I just think it's important to keep some sort of professional distance with my management” because it is true, but he didn't seem convinced. He's now been even more distant at work, and it's harder to work with him. Other people…


It happened a couple of months ago: I had my yearly performance review at my office job, and my manager point blank asked me: “I don't think you like me?”

I fully blanked out at that moment, because what are you supposed to reply to that? What if I had replied “yes indeed I dislike you ;)”? This felt like such a weird thing to ask to your subordinate. Why do you care if I like you or not? As long as we work together well and I get my job done, why do you care?

I babbled a reply around the lines of “oh no not at all, I just think it's important to keep some sort of professional distance with my management” because it is true, but he didn't seem convinced. He's now been even more distant at work, and it's harder to work with him.

Other people in my team have also told me similar stories. He seems to be very concerned about if people like him or not. He shouldn't be a manager if he wants to be liked so much. There will always be a struggle between him and the subordinates, because he has power over us. Just accept that they don't have to like you and stop asking weird questions.

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