I'm posting for the first time in a long time after discovering this subreddit, and respect all the information everyone has been sharing so far. It's truly inspiring!
My contract ends on April 30th as an adjunct prof at a local university, and I've decided not to renew in the fall. I've found out that my department is basically grooming a current grad student to take over my classes.. while also developing new courses for her to teach. Meanwhile I've been begging for more opportunities for the past 3 years.
I'm one teaching term away from being eligible to get medical benefits, but even then I have to apply and it's not a guarantee. I've been teaching here since 2018 and genuinely thought it was my dream job. But I'm just sad and exhausted every day.
I got my Masters to be able to teach, and based on performance reviews and reviews from students, I'd say I'm pretty good at it (the only negative course review I received was from my first year teaching). I absolutely love teaching, but there is no opportunity for growth or stability in my current position. My department is small and unsupportive as well.
Unfortunately, I'm also in a niche area and as we all know, university jobs are few and far between.
After teaching university for the past several years I've gone back to school part time to earn my BEd. It's an enjoyable program and I'm learning a lot, but I'm still terrified of what my life is going to become. Thoughts of failure, self loathing and embarrassment flood my mind every time someone asks me 'what's next'.
I've finished the first year of the program and will be starting my first practicum soon, and I'm scared of what the other teachers will think about my life choices. I know it's silly and I shouldn't care what other people think. But still… Social and family pressure has been hard.
How can one build themselves up mentally after quitting their job and starting over? As I said before I'm not eligible for health coverage, so affording a therapist isn't in the cards at this point. Hopefully soon though.
Any tips or guidance?