I will be going out on leave soon because I'm having a baby. I got a wonderful email from HR telling how excited they are that I qualify for their job security and that I can use my medical leave bank that I have been accruing since I started. Woohoo a whooping 50 hours. Thank you so much for covering me for 1 weeks pay which is half of my paycheck. Luckily I will have state FMLA which will only cover 1000k a week and takes 3 to 6 weeks just to process. Here's the kicker. I can't apply with out a birth certificate! Woo fucking hoo. What will I do for those weeks while it's processing oh I dunno probably work which will then disqualify me from my FMLA. My job can go fuck itself.