I hate what I do, I hate expectations, I hate having to perform, I hate having to justify every little thing I do, I hate having to micromanage my subordinates and my peers, I hate pretending I'm in charge when I'm just another cog in the machine, I hate that everything has to be calculated, I hate having to pretend to be someone I'm not to fit big brother's idea of a good worker, I hate doing meaningless stuff just to keep a roof over my head and satisfy family/relatives' idea of a well accomplished individual, I hate how everything around me pushes me to desire more stuff, more shit to do, more shit to buy, more shit to keep my dopamine-deprived brain busy and away from remembering how fucking miserable I am.
At this point I just want to open a small grocery store in a middle-of-nowhere tiny-ass village full of elderly people that'll come to buy their bread, milk and tobacco, fill their lottery grid, read the newspaper and receive their mail. I'll barely earn enough to make ends meet. There will be no public transports, nothing to do within a 40km radius, slow-ass internet and my social circles are gonna be just the people that step foot inside my store and my neighbors maybe.
And that's just fine. So I'll do just that.