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Antiwork

Today my manager made me cry because they accused me that my email had tone

She said that we will have a meeting to address how I speak with my managers among other things (I’m leaving the details out for the other things but they are work related). The thing is, I’m a very sensitive and empathetic person so I’m careful about what I do or say beforehand so not to cause bad feelings. I proofread my email several times before sending for neutral language and after my manager replied to my email with her accusation, I had three other colleagues read my email and they all said that it was perfectly fine, assertive but not rude. One colleague even suggested that I file a complaint with HR because this is a professional work environment and I shouldn’t have to tolerate toxic colleagues. Which I wholeheartedly agree with. I had sent 2 emails after receiving her reply. One to apologise even though I know damn…


She said that we will have a meeting to address how I speak with my managers among other things (I’m leaving the details out for the other things but they are work related). The thing is, I’m a very sensitive and empathetic person so I’m careful about what I do or say beforehand so not to cause bad feelings. I proofread my email several times before sending for neutral language and after my manager replied to my email with her accusation, I had three other colleagues read my email and they all said that it was perfectly fine, assertive but not rude. One colleague even suggested that I file a complaint with HR because this is a professional work environment and I shouldn’t have to tolerate toxic colleagues. Which I wholeheartedly agree with.

I had sent 2 emails after receiving her reply. One to apologise even though I know damn well that I have nothing to be sorry about, the other to seek feedback. She didn’t provide any, but I will be asking again for feedback in the meeting. My email literally stated facts, there was no emotional language, it reads like a science journal – dry.

Now my face is all puffy from crying, and I don’t know if I’ll be able to meet an impossible deadline tomorrow, but I’m open to your thoughts about next steps. One colleague has generously volunteered to help out if I feel uneasy during the meeting and I will be taking notes during the meeting as per their suggestion.

I should also note that this manager was recently made a leader. I am new to her team. My impression of her so far is that she isn’t doing so well in her new leadership role, particularly in supporting her her team, in communication, and in this case, in her choice of language. Perhaps she is as sensitive as I am, but she sure isn’t careful with her words.

PS I’m in the Australasia region. I don’t want to be too specific to avoid being identified, especially at my organisation.

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