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What a narcissist, this job post is something else!

Dear Professional Job Seeker: My name is XXXXX XXXXXX and I invite you to carefully consider my company, XXXXX XXXXXXXX XXX XXX, as your next professional opportunity. Perhaps you are a college educated and experienced professional who is looking for a career change. Or maybe you just completed your college degree and find yourself asking, now what? We are an industrial distribution company that provides everyday products to everyday people. We are about being exquisite at the craft of business. We put your education to use. We challenge your brain. We are not a call center. We do not sit all day. In fact, we are physically demanding. We believe in making constant improvements – we work hard to improve ourselves, to improve each other, and to improve our craft. We believe in recruiting talented individuals at every opportunity. We work hard to be proactive, not reactive. Thomas Edison once…


Dear Professional Job Seeker:

My name is XXXXX XXXXXX and I invite you to carefully consider my company, XXXXX XXXXXXXX XXX XXX, as your next professional opportunity. Perhaps you are a college educated and experienced professional who is looking for a career change. Or maybe you just completed your college degree and find yourself asking, now what? We are an industrial distribution company that provides everyday products to everyday people. We are about being exquisite at the craft of business. We put your education to use. We challenge your brain. We are not a call center. We do not sit all day. In fact, we are physically demanding. We believe in making constant improvements – we work hard to improve ourselves, to improve each other, and to improve our craft. We believe in recruiting talented individuals at every opportunity. We work hard to be proactive, not reactive.

Thomas Edison once said:

“Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration. Accordingly, a ’genius’ is often merely a talented person who has done all of his or her homework.”

We love this quote! Thomas Edison was far from lazy. We aren’t lazy either. We believe in hard work, attention to what matters to the customer and a huge amount of dedication to that end. Does caring for the customer look like a buddy relationship? Hell no. It looks like competence. We complete the order. We deliver on time. We track customer cylinders to make their lives easier. All the boring little details that bring perfection to the generation of an order. We are competent. We are accountable. We can be a friend, but we are competent and accountable first. We are, as Jim Collins says, “productively neurotic, self-motivated and self-disciplined”. We are industrial…not pretty, but rather clever. We don’t focus on the façade of greatness, we work toward greatness. We are jam-packed with opportunity, but as Edison said:

“Unfortunately, there seems to be far more opportunity out there than ability…. We should remember that good fortune often happens when opportunity meets with preparation.”

Are you prepared? We aim to be the best in our industry. Some of our customers think we already are, but we want to dazzle our customers with flawless execution. We want to leave them in awe of how we answer the phone, fill the order, deliver it on time, process the invoice and finally meet every need they have for excellence in customer service. Simple, right? Only it does not happen enough in service businesses today.

So what to think? We sell stuff that is used in everyone’s life almost every day. You, most likely, used one of the products we sell today. This product line is how we stand the test of time, practicing business for the last 90 years. When your mom goes to the hospital it might be our oxygen that meets her in the emergency room. We provide the magic gas that makes your kid giggle at the dentist, instead of cry. It means when you pop a cork at your wedding there is indeed, a “pop”.

We worry about the customer first so if you think we will coddle you, think again. However, we will spend a great deal of time and money training you. We will have fun but it is the kind of work fun of industry. It is not the stuff of internet creativity. We do not have a ping pong table. We work and we get paid for our work so we can go home and have fun with the ones we love. Our pride comes from knowing that we made our business and our customers’ business run better for another day. It’s a great job in a country that allows great opportunity for those who care enough to know they have what it takes but need to learn the skills necessary to succeed.

We are a great opportunity for those who can see what, to us, is so very obvious.

If we sound right for you, then I invite you to apply with us. We will ask you a lot of questions about you. We want to get to know you just as much as we want you to get to know us. Our recruiting team will dive into who you are, what you’ve done and why. We don’t beat around the bush and ask that you don’t either. Our process is careful, deliberate and challenging but I can assure you that at the end of it all you will know exactly who we are and what to expect from us and vice versa.

Thank you,

Job Requirements:

Associate's degree is required, Bachelor's degree is preferred

Ability to pay close attention to detail in paperwork

Physical movement of products including atmospheric gas cylinders and boxes of 60 pound wire

The ability to work in an industrial environment

A college degree is a requirement. No applications will be considered without a degree. No applications will be considered via any method other than the e-mail attached to this ad. Be sure you send your full resume or we will not look at it. Also cover letters show us you are serious and that you are reading this sentence right now. It will show that you actually read all the way through as you consider the most important decision you will make.

Walk-in applicants and calls will immediately eliminate candidates from review as you failed the first test relating to following directions.

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