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Write agendas and keep notes about meetings with your managers to avoid gaslighting…

tl;dr: Write everything down. Don't rely on your memory, you will forget. Psychopathic managers will try to implant false memories into you and as long as you have something on paper or on the computer, they won't have a chance anymore. I'm a technical writer doing contracts. My manager has had several so called 1:1 meetings where all he would do is review my work. This is supposed to be outside the scope of these personal meetings. It's supposed to be about discussion my performance, what my current focus and future projects. That never happened. Eventually, I got frustrated with him and told him “I want an actual 1:1 meeting, not reviewing my work”. “If you want to review the content, use the same protocol that every one on the team is using, leaving comments in the document” Anyways, so the next meeting, I told him that I wanted to…


tl;dr: Write everything down. Don't rely on your memory, you will forget. Psychopathic managers will try to implant false memories into you and as long as you have something on paper or on the computer, they won't have a chance anymore.

I'm a technical writer doing contracts.

My manager has had several so called 1:1 meetings where all he would do is review my work. This is supposed to be outside the scope of these personal meetings. It's supposed to be about discussion my performance, what my current focus and future projects. That never happened.

Eventually, I got frustrated with him and told him “I want an actual 1:1 meeting, not reviewing my work”. “If you want to review the content, use the same protocol that every one on the team is using, leaving comments in the document”

Anyways, so the next meeting, I told him that I wanted to discuss my performance and goals. I was prepared, with meeting notes from the pervious ones, and the agendas in his face from pervious meetings.

He didn't know that I was armed, and didn't let him open his mouth. I started talking first and kept talking and talking complaining about how he treated me.

His tactic would be always like “don't you remember we discussed this already? you surely don't remember?”

I showed him the notes and the agendas in his face, with my notes written in the most beautiful of calligraphy. He went quiet and turned quite yellow. He didn't have the guts to face the camera.

Throughout the meeting, I kept my composure, staring straight into the camera. As a writer, I'm blessed with a wide vocabulary and extensive lexicon. I spit out complex verbose diction and watched him get lost again and again.

After the meeting that he preemptively ended without closure, I felt relieved. I defended myself. Since then, he doesn't dare criticize me anymore. His stronghold on me was no longer there and implicitly admitted that he really needs me for my work.

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