I hope I’m posting this in the right group. If not, please let me know.
It’s been two years since the worst time of my professional career, and it’s still bothering me. So I’m hoping to share and a) help others and b) help myself.
I spent 4 years at a (large) company being mistreated by my manager. At first I thought it was just the way she was – snide comments, overreacting, trash talking. But over time it became obvious I was being targeted. And her treatment of me was so horrible it drove me to two medical leaves (anxiety/stress).
For the first couple of years, her treatment of me was unprofessional and rough. But then she got coaching from her director on how to be professional, then put me under a microscope (to performance me out). All of my work was audited and the slightest mistake was documented. She was gaslighting me constantly and making me second guess myself.
I’ve never received anything less than solid performer on any review prior to working for her. Under her, I was consistently rated “developing.” Shortly before I left, she had told me that due to my hard work that year I would not be given anything less than solid performer(this was about two months before review time). At my review, guess who got developing performer and a write up. I told her that she had lied to me, and I was being retaliated against for reporting her (she had blown up at me and said fuck in front of staff). I went on medical leave the very next day and never went back.
In retrospect, she did so much damage to my physical and mental health that I should have left and sorely regret that I didn’t.
I believe she initially turned against me because the company did a yearly survey and they put a huge emphasis on the scores. Our entire yearly focus was based on improving those outcomes. You were supposed to be honest but she made it clear in several different ways that a good score was extremely important. By the time my first survey came around, I had been there long enough to see the problems and unhealthy culture. I took the survey and said exactly what I thought. The funny/not funny part is that they assured us it was anonymous, but it was broken down by team and her immediate team was me and one other supervisor that worshipped the ground she walked on. So, not anonymous at all and the beginning of all of my problems.
The one good thing I did during that whole time was tell her to her face she was the worst manager I’ve ever worked for.
Now you have most of the story, here’s what I learned:
If you’re in a toxic environment, leave because nothing will fix it.
If for some reason you cannot leave, document everything. Dates, times, what was said.
Report it to HR. What she did to me was illegal on a number of levels. If HR doesn’t take satisfactory action, escalate it to the labor department in your state or whatever the equivalent is in your country.
Be your own advocate. Nobody else is going to help you. You have to be able to help yourself.
You have the legal right to a non-toxic work environment.