Background: We currently work hybrid, I have a 1 hour commute on the NYC Subway. Coworkers all have a much shorter commute. I have mentioned several times I dislike staying out past 9 pm given incidents on the subway (you know, face slashing, getting pushed into the tracks) I’m the second most senior person on the team but supervisor has dropped a lot of hints that I am not social enough. Team currently reeks of toxic positivity. Boss (female) always reads a motivational quote, usually after badmouthing other teams. Boss also constantly reminds us of the optional but not really office hours she has on Friday, when we aren’t supposed to have meetings. Other members insist on socializing after work and will even send chat messages on weekend about it.
Now onto the story. We threw a goodbye party for our intern at some 21+ rec center and the calendar invite had it blocked from 6-8:30. It didn’t seem bad so I agreed to go. The day of, I was feeling very off (no covid symptoms but I was not sleeping well, I had no energy) but I couldn’t really beg off. Turns out, the actual reservation was for 8pm. After our time was up (9:00 team insisted we hang out for another round of drinks. By that time, we all had already had 2 drinks and I was already done. But hey, at least boss was paying for the pizza.
By about 10:30 pm after everyone else has had another 3 drinks, the circlejerk begins where my boss starts telling us that we’re all awesome and how she loves us all, but not before she had trashed a few former employees and the most junior person on the team made some racist comments about another coworker she is feuding with. Boss uses the opportunity to put her arm around me and another female coworker and give us both a kiss on the cheek. I dislike touching of any kind from people I am not close to, even a pat on the back so already I’m pissed off. Boss does this again, about 3 times. I am at that point already at the end of my rope when the next most senior person decides he wants to do karaoke. I finally am able to convince my coworkers it’s past my bedtime and I’m going home. We all get up to leave but then They see one of those 360 photo booths and of course, they insist on doing it. We take one picture but it didn’t turn out the way they wanted so they wanted to do another one. At that point I see I have about 5 minutes to leave or else I am going to be waiting another 30 minutes for the next subway so I leave without saying goodbye and walk. I see the subway pulling in and start running, bang my leg against something and make it in with hardly a second to spare. As I’m wallowing in pain and self pity, I see some crazy dude start making his way up and down the car and I spend a good 15 minutes looking down on the ground hoping he doesn’t notice me. Fortunately he leaves and the rest of the ride is uneventful. It was past 12 when I finally fall asleep.
Epilogue: I log in to the daily status meeting and boss and coworkers spend a good 15 minutes talking about how much fun it all was.