I am just feeling absolutely disgusted by the workplace right now and don't understand how companies preach mental health and wellness and then completely disregard you when you actually ARE mentally unstable.
So I don't know if this is “antiwork” work since it is not so much MY workplace as the insurance that covers our benefits, such as FMLA and disability leave, which I am currently utilizing. I mean it is still the norm so I'll describe it.
Unexpectedly, almost 2 months ago now, my mother passed away. We were close. I mean I live 1400 miles away, but we were like talk on the phone every day and there for each other completely in every way imaginable close. Basically I still needed her a lot and was already not in a good place because of financial issues because my husband and I have both been sick, well more sick than usual, recently and I had to take part time and he just wasn't making enough where he was on the minimal hours. She was helping me through it. When this happened my entire world shifted. So they give us FIVE WHOLE DAYS of bereavement and I said “no way. I am literally going out of my mind and I need at least a month back in PA with my family and the other 2 months back at home to figure out what is happening in my life since I just lost a huge part of it.”
Right now I am on an FMLA leave for mental health reasons, because I just can't deal with anything above the capacity of getting out of bed in the morning, which is also hard, and I told them since we both had to leave in a rush and throw away any progress my husband had at his new job I will need it to be a disability claim so I can receive compensation. Seemed easy enough, I did it at another place and the company that worked with them was cut and dry, real easy, this is not the same case here. My leave started on July 7, and it has been like pulling teeth every step of the way to get them to work with me. I told them my mom passed away and I am mentally unwell and can not work. They have reached out to my PCP and THREE therapists I am currently seeing to “evaluate” my condition. They have ALL confirmed I am mentally unwell and need time, even suggesting it be a long term instead of short term so I can do a few months of grief counseling and therapy and my psychiatrist sees a change in my depression, anxiety, and mental state overall.
So now what it bothering me isn't their want to make sure my doctor says that I need the time or needing to have a physician's statement. I get that is protocol. My word should be enough, but hey that's not how it works here. What is bothering me is the fact that they have gotten all the paperwork stating I am not in the place mentally to work so I need a disability leave, but they keep sending MORE paperwork to my PCP and requesting personal notes from sessions with therapists such as their notes on the session and the evaluation and wanting the grief counselor to confirm things. They just sent a perfecting questionnaire (whatever the hell that is) to my doctor and she told me what was on it and it was DEEPLY personal questions.
I am starting to feel bothered. I signed authorization for them to obtain whatever they want, but it feels like they are trying to run out time on my leave and then, I don't know, conveniently mark my return to work as passed or soon and just not pay me for the disability time. I don't know the law well enough to know if all of this is legal or a tactic they are able to use, but it is just killing me. 2 months almost with no pay and my husband is just now getting back to work and I've got the bills paid thanks to help from family and the little bit of the life insurance check that I got from my dad out of what was left (not much).
Soon though it is next month and they are really just being ridiculous at this point nitpicking every little detail of what is going on with me. This is so upsetting on top of the grief I have been experiencing and random depressive episodes/awful panic attacks that have been non-stop and when this all piles up again I will not have the one person I could always turn to.
Sorry for the long rant. Ive just seen so much helpful info and support in this group sine I joined and I hate this placd anymore. Not the group. This country/the workplace. I mean it was always awful. Something has go change.