I’m making this post on behalf of my friend who’s struggling to find work due to being unable to obtain a reference from their previous employer. They’re currently 21 and have worked as kitchen staff in a residential care home for the past 5 years. This is their only work experience, so they have nobody else they can use as a reference other than their manager at this position.
They left the job this summer due to increasingly hostile and unsanitary working conditions that were left unaddressed by management, and while they were incredibly civil and did not state this as their reason for putting in their notice, their manager took it badly and was spiteful about them leaving.
They have been training to work in child counselling, and recently having completed their qualifications they’ve been seeking full-time work in this field. They’ve received several offers and completed several successful interviews & all the relevant legal checks. The issue is that the agencies they’ve applied to require a reference from a previous employer. Unfortunately, upon being asked to provide a reference their manager has repeatedly ignored or blocked requests from both themselves and the agency. Knowing this is my friend’s only option, she is now making open insults to my friend about their character, saying that they’re too quiet and sensitive to pursue this career, and harassing them by insisting they come in to speak to her in order to “prove” they can be trusted to work around children. They say that if my friend does not meet with her face-to-face (to essentially endure being futher insulted and threatened) she will not provide a reference.
This has been really stressful for my friend, as they’re a very kind and non-confrontational person, and they feel like they’re being shut out of the profession they’ve trained years for because they don’t want to have to combat with their ex-employer’s spitefulness. I really want to help them out in this shitty situation, but have no idea where to start or what options they have. If anyone can provide advice then we would both really appreciate it!
***TL;DR ex-manager is angry my friend quit their unsanitary and hostile min-wage job, now refusing to provide a reference for my friend because she says they’re ‘too sensitive’ to work with kids, despite them having years of training and successfully completing multiple interviews and character checks. Friend has no other options for previous employers and now can’t get work in the career path they’ve trained for. What can we do?