For context, the project lead (senior technologist) is my friend that I met through school. He was the first employee hired to the company, following me being the third employee hired (5 years later) with the help of networking with him. I counted on him to be my mentor since we were a few years out of post secondary, I had no prior experience in our field, and I literally forgot everything we learned from school. He made sure that I know we aren't friends at work and to keep it separate, which is fair, I understood that.
This is my first time working in an architectural office and been here for the last 4 years. Would you agree the following actions seem like micro management from the project lead (senior technologist)?:
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Standing behind me, crossing his arms, sighing really loud almost like he's disappointed and looking at my screen to see the project/task I'm currently working on.
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I'll be working on one area of the floor plan, he would come up behind to look at my screen and watch me work then he will notice a mistake in a different area, sigh out loud, and tell me to correct it. Then we start going through other mistakes on the drawings.
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At one point during the pandemic, our boss didn't want us to do OT however being in this industry, we also have deadlines to meet, I would have a hard time meeting the deadline so I would do OT but not charge my hours. The project lead knows my hours are typically 7AM – 4PM once it hit 4:30, he would come over, look at my screen and ask me what I'm working on, sighs and tells me “remember what he told us? No OT.” I should mention that our boss had never come up to me about the OT but figured it was for personal development.Then the project lead would show his passive aggressive side towards me because our boss would not let him do OT when he asked.
These are some examples and I had a mental breakdown last year because I received no acknowledgement of my own work and felt like I wasn't good enough for my job. My boss was fully understanding of my situation and had a talk with the project lead. This year has been better because we hired juniors, I feel that I have leveled up my knowledge because I want to help the juniors from struggling the way I did and providing more explanation and understanding. At this point, I'm considered intermediate in my position.
Prior to the juniors starting, our boss mentioned to everyone in the office out loud that he would like for everyone to show a good office culture.
Recently, our boss was leaving for vacation in 3 days so the project lead wanted to hand in projects for review. 2 days before our boss was leaving for vacay, I was tired that day and my pace was slow so by the end of the day, the project lead started to show the same passive aggressiveness towards me. I started having flashbacks. The next day, a junior came up to me venting that she felt the disappointed sigh from him, the constant looking at her screen to see what she's working on, and the feeling of not doing good enough.
Since he's my “friend”, should I talk to him directly about his actions and behaviours or should I go to the boss about it? Do you think it's time for me to move on to a new company with a better work culture?
Thanks for taking the time to read this! It's been on my mind this past week and I feel stuck.