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Antiwork

Need some perspective/guidance on some feedback received (Communication)

Thanks for reading. I'll try not to spiral or meander. I recently started a new job (office/tech industry). I've had lots of life changes happening behind the scene-I relocated to be within a five minute commute to the office, and I ended a one-year relationship. I live by myself and don't have a circle of friends to stay busy with, but I do keep myself occupied with healthy hobbies. My previous job was mostly a virtual experience with online collaboration and communication, and I made a decision to course-correct a bit at the new job by trying to encourage my own personality and positivity, while being a sponge and learning from my peers. Today, my direct manager and an HR rep connected with me saying some concerns were raised about my style and method of communication. They mentioned I was not always clear or concise with my written communication, and…


Thanks for reading. I'll try not to spiral or meander.

I recently started a new job (office/tech industry). I've had lots of life changes happening behind the scene-I relocated to be within a five minute commute to the office, and I ended a one-year relationship. I live by myself and don't have a circle of friends to stay busy with, but I do keep myself occupied with healthy hobbies.

My previous job was mostly a virtual experience with online collaboration and communication, and I made a decision to course-correct a bit at the new job by trying to encourage my own personality and positivity, while being a sponge and learning from my peers.

Today, my direct manager and an HR rep connected with me saying some concerns were raised about my style and method of communication. They mentioned I was not always clear or concise with my written communication, and that I'm routinely creating more ambiguity by having far too much detail in an email or chat when a quick call would be easier to follow. They also said others felt I was communicating with them at inopportune times (i.e. outside of business hours) and about irrelevant, non-work-related topics.

I'm not going to be defensive about how my teammates experience me, and I'll also admit that as a new employee, I've probably have been looking for validation and acknowledgement more than most people, who have been there for a while. One encouraging sign was their willingness to work with me to better understand what I need to succeed in my job, and to better draw a work/life boundary so I'm not oversharing or oversocializing. They also said this was not a formal warning or a disciplinary action, but that some steps would be taken to make sure it was addressed. (I asked because at a former job I had been presented with a PIP because of a similar communication issue with a former colleague, in spite of taking action to improve the situation. Still some lingering professional/personal anxiety from it.)

I'm eager to see if anyone has advice on what I can do to reframe this situation in my mind and take a really good look at what led me here. I already know I'll be lingering on it most of the weekend, and that my own ability to catastrophize is risking withdrawal from the plans I had made for myself this weekend. I'll add that I have a counseling session on Tuesday so I plan to discuss it more then. Happy to add anything to help clarify details if I can.

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