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Antiwork

I’m finally in a place that truly appreciates me, and I thought I’d share.

My 3-month review in December was fairly standard, not much that I haven't heard before from past employers. This is an office position, but I came from 20+ years of retail and service work experience, and I think you all know what that does to a person's mentality. I've unfortunately developed some toxic habits of being paranoid about my perceived fragile position in a company, and feeling the need to protect myself when I feel I've toe'd some imaginative line. So, as I was sitting there feeling fairly jaded to the feedback, my boss threw me a curve-ball. He said, “I can tell you've been under-appreciated in your past roles, and I'm hoping we can change that.” What he said stuck with me, however, I've heard similar things from past managers; describing how much they appreciate my hard work, but it's always hollow words or empty gestures. I asked about…


My 3-month review in December was fairly standard, not much that I haven't heard before from past employers. This is an office position, but I came from 20+ years of retail and service work experience, and I think you all know what that does to a person's mentality. I've unfortunately developed some toxic habits of being paranoid about my perceived fragile position in a company, and feeling the need to protect myself when I feel I've toe'd some imaginative line.

So, as I was sitting there feeling fairly jaded to the feedback, my boss threw me a curve-ball. He said, “I can tell you've been under-appreciated in your past roles, and I'm hoping we can change that.” What he said stuck with me, however, I've heard similar things from past managers; describing how much they appreciate my hard work, but it's always hollow words or empty gestures.

I asked about the possibility of discussing a raise, and he said he would look into “what is appropriate.” We're a new company, so a lot of these processes are new to him as well.

So, today was my 6-month review, sort of a scheduled follow-up to our discussion in December. I've been feeling pretty good lately; a lot of the toxic mentality and habits I developed over the decades have begun to go away, my work has steadily improved, and I've begun taking on more. I was told a couple weeks ago that I never repeat the same mistake twice. I've also been praised about my attention to detail, and it's been expressed that I've relieved much of the burden from management's shoulders. Again, however, all of these praises mean nothing if there's not a valid demonstration of commendation. I've been praised in the past with nothing to show for it, but I kept my skepticism to myself.

I'll skip ahead to the end where we discussed compensation. He agreed I am deserving of a raise, and said my base pay would increase by 4%. Additionally, I would receive a one-time bonus as a thank you for getting us out of a work-load nightmare the last few months. Then, he described a bonus structure where, for each pay period, if I meet the requirements for work quality and meet every deadline, I would receive additional bonuses. If I were to hypothetically achieve each of these bonuses, my wage increase would effectively be 10%. This was all recorded in writing with his and my signatures.

I was absolutely stunned and had a difficult time containing the emotions bubbling up from my belly to my chest. I joked to him afterwards that I'd have to call my mum to give her the good news, and he chuckled and said he understood.

That phone call later resulted in a nearly ear-splitting scream of excitement and delight from her. She was in the same position as me not too long ago; being over-worked and under-appreciated in toxic work environments. She completely sympathized with where I was mentally only a few months ago, and shared in my joyous accomplishment of finding a place that TRULY and TANGIBLY demonstrates their appreciation for their employees.

I'm very excited for what the future holds, and look forward to my personal and professional development within this company.

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