I have been studying psychology for over 10 years and have a master's in industrial organizational psychology. One thing that is pretty universal is that people desire control. It's mainly based on safety in an evolutionary sense. If you lack control, that means someone else has it, and they can dictate your fate.
A great example of this is police officers. Most police officers are raised in strict households. They grow up with authoritarian parents who are controlling and demanding. So they learn power dynamics at an early age. When they grow up, they seek the power that their parents held over them. A lot of it is, “now it's my turn.” Again, they feel safer knowing they are in control. This is also bullying 101 right here. A bully's behavior is directly correlated to this parenting style.
Authoritative parenting is different because it utilizes authority, it doesn't abuse it. This is much better for development and growth in children because it is not a power dynamic. It is a cooperative dynamic. So an authoritarian parent might demand that their child do chores because they are the parent and you need to listen to them. But that is not a reason. That teaches the child nothing but that they should listen to orders and not think. An authoritative parent would teach the child the value of hard work, and maybe do the chore with them the first time. Make it fun with them. Teach by modeling. It is the best way to teach someone. Show them what to do. This is what good parents do. They don't try to be above their children, they are working with their children and empowering them. Now, it's also important to note that this is not a magical solution to make children listen to everything you say. They yell and scream, they cry and pout. They're kids, it happens. So you do have to be firm in these situations, but you need to balance it out with love and respect. This is a huge point for good managing styles. You have to lay down the law sometimes, but you don't belittle your employee and make them feel small. What are the next steps to improving?
Ok so connecting this to work, you can see a clear difference in managers who live by authoritarian tendencies and those who live by authoritative tendencies. Unfortunately authoritarian people have that seed of power dynamics planted within them. They have been taught that power is important, so they seek it out. This is why bad people are always in charge. They have the hunger for control within them because they lack it. It's a bad cycle, and anytime you deal with a bad manager, you should remember this. I would bet that managers you've known with this trait have messy personal lives too. Troublesome kids, divorces, substance abuse. It's all connected.
The best way to deal with them is exactly what this subreddit does. It exposes them and resists their bullying. That's what it is, they are bullies. Police are bullies. Even most politicians are bullies. Take the power away from them and make them feel weak. Don't feed into their power trip. Basically I just want to give my seal of approval for everything this subreddit does, and I also want to recognize those authoritative managers who are killing it.
Thanks.