I am sort of in a weird place in my life.
I had a very stable, long-term WFH hybrid position but the owner was batshit crazy and the entire org was a complete mess. (I made a post on here about it a month ago; owner sent me gross feet pics, boundaries constantly crossed, misogynistic, racist, etc.) Many of you told me to quit, and you were all right, so I found another position that paid more and seemed to have everything together.
I start the new job and they completely threw me into the wolves; no training, job description was not accurate, crazy workload, toxic culture and seriously fucked up employees. (This was an HR position.) This is the same thing that happened previously so I am bitter that this happened again. During my interviews with the new place I specifically asked them very detailed questions regarding their grievances, what the outcomes were, how the dept functions (since this was a heavy employee relation HR position) and they said everything was great, no serious issues – they are all “family.” (This is where I should have ran for the door – I know. They meant family in that awful way we associate it, but they also meant it literally. I understood the owners were family but I didn't think every person in a position of power was somehow related to the owners or their bff.)
On my first week, I find out about some serious ER issues; drugs, violence, an unknown employee that smears their own feces on the walls. At this point I am really pissed that I quit one nuthouse to end up at another nuthouse. I stuck around for almost a month because I was terrified of not having a back-up and wanted the money but I finally reached my breaking point, had enough and quit yesterday after a horrifying experience with a new hire.
For the entire month I was there, I would come home and cry. I lost 10lbs since accepting the position – I never feel hungry. So now, I am unemployed.
Are all employers toxic or am I too 'soft' ? Why do I keep getting sucked into these toxic orgs? This keeps happening and I don't know how to break the cycle.
TLDR – quit toxic job to only end up at another toxic job. (I quit with no back-up) Are all employers toxic and abusive or am I too soft?