I was interviewed in a panel of four interviewers, and he was one of them. After I got the job and settled in, over a few months I heard miscellaneous comments from coworkers saying You know, (his name) speaks so highly and kind about you. He’s very supportive of you
One coworker said after our work meetings, she noticed when I’m not looking he was watching with me with a look of admiration
In my time there he was always so kind and helpful. One time I had a flat tire at work, on his way out he noticed me and asked if everything is ok. I said yes that I would call one of my brothers (mechanics) to help me. He insisted to help me. I said I really did not want to trouble him, it’s really okay, but he insisted. This man actually jacked the car up and changed my tire for me to the spare, and checked the pressure on all the tires!!! I was extremely thankful and the next day tried to buy him lunch as a thank you, but he would not accept and said he would do anything for me, that it was his pleasure
Several months later I quit for another job (higher salary, closer to home). Some coworkers said in meetings he was no longer smiling or joking for a while.
Some time in to my new job, he texted me asking how I was doing. The conversation evolved in to him inviting me out for coffee. I accepted.
Closer to that day, I texted checking in. No answer. Thankfully I didn’t waste any time getting ready since there wasn’t confirmation, on the day of, it was disappointing though.. and frankly surprising. I had considered him a genuine friend as he was kind at work, but a true friend would never do anything remotely close to that
He reached out in the future acting normal but I didn’t respond… it just felt so rude. I had a polite proper work relation with him so it just felt uncalled for.
Again a few weeks later he reached out again. This time I responded, but didn’t ask about the plan as I had no intention of being friends. Over time … texting we got closer again and it felt genuine like when we were coworkers, and he asked me again for plans. I thought it was different this time, I didn’t see it coming where he ghosted again.
So I deleted him off all social medias and ignored his texts. He kept trying to re-add me. Part of me doesn’t want to give the satisfaction of a reaction from him ghosting me. It really did hurt my feelings
Men… do you know why…? I had felt he was a genuine friend. Somehow understanding can help me move on in a way
Thank you for your time I really appreciate all input