Or rather, why does everything have to be so fast*? My boss just called me on my day off to lecture me for 20 minutes about how I’m not moving as fast (I have hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, it affects my connective tissue and if I don’t do things a certain way I dislocate my joints, especially in my back, shoulders, wrists and hands and causes a lot of pain as I’m constantly tensed to keep things from going out of place.) as the other housekeepers, and that I’m not as good as them because I forget things occasionally or I miss something, when literally every other housekeeper at my hotel does too (I’ve helped every single one and they’ve all forgotten way more things than I have, and my rooms are by far the cleanest after I’m done. Not that it’s a contest, just a side statement for context.)
Everything, all the time, right now. Fast-paced, upbeat, high stress, quick moving environment. It’s exhausting…
I want something slow. Something I can take at whatever pace I can manage that day. Some days I can get 3 days worth of work done, other times 3 days gets 1 days worth of work done.
Everything is so high speed, instant gratification, get it done go go go go go go go go…until you’re fried, burnt out, and hate what you do, even if you liked it in the beginning of the mess.
I understand that everywhere is short handed. I understand that people like things quickly. I understand that some people like the nonstop until they get home, or high energy stuff.
The thing is, I don’t. I want something slow, or at least self paced. It drives me up a wall when I have higherups breathing down my neck and hovering over my work and constantly criticizing every little thing I do.
“It’s not good enough,”
“It’s not fast enough,”
“You forgot X and Y and Z,”
“We need to get this done in X amount of time or you’re in trouble,”
“You need to pick up the pace,”
I’m not lazy, I’m just slower at things than some other people, and I refuse to hype myself up on caffeine and taurine every day so I can move at lighting pace. I don’t want to do that to my body. I’m a naturally slower person, and I have other factors that slow me down both mentally and physically.
It just constantly feels like I’m not good enough or lazy or not trying hard enough or less than my coworkers, but there’s no slow paced jobs…either that or I don’t know any.