I work at a big box store and make $15/hr. I stock shelves with kitchen and domestic related things.
I am slow. I go at my own pace, and for the most part that seems to be okay. I am not a hustler. I’m not a great team player, I’ll admit that.
Today I was unpacking domestics truck and we had 2 full pallets. It looked like a lot, but my supervisor told me it wasn’t, that the boxes were just big. My supervisor and I were working on unpacking today. I was pretty tired today and was being pretty slow, a bit more than usual. I was hoping my supervisor wouldn’t get upset with me and surprisingly she didn’t. I came back from my 15 and most of the truck was done. There was one u boat’s worth of stuff left for me to put out and there didn’t seem to be any problem, she seemed happy/pleased overall. I've learned in therapy that unless someone says something is wrong, assume there is no problem so I've been trying to do that.
So I finished the u boat, I noticed there were a few things left on the pallet as I was about to leave but didn’t think it was a big deal, maybe someone would be here tonight anyway, I don't know. So I went to tell her I was about to clock out. She said she “doesn't like to be taken advantage of” and asked me to put the rest of the stuff away that was on the pallet.
So I told her afterwards as I grabbed the stuff that I wasn’t trying to take advantage of her, and that she was looking at it from a different angle than I do: she’s a supervisor, I’m a team member. And I told her again I wasn’t trying to take advantage of her, I’m just exhausted. She explained that she’s been busting her ass all day, was trying to be helpful and tries to make everyone’s day easier. That she is also exhausted but you wouldn’t know it from how she’s hustling. That she likes to leave the day knowing she did a “kick ass job” regardless of how tired she is and got a lot done. I told her ok, I understand that, but it’s not right to assume motivation on my part just because I'm not that way. We just come from different perspectives, and I straight up told her I just don't hustle.
Honestly, am I the asshole here? I’m 26, and my entire working life I’ve never been a hustler. I just cannot for the life of me bring myself to care enough to work fast and hard. I am a lazy person at home, too. Am I just being a little bitch? I seriously just can’t bring myself to care enough, the work is monotonous, I get bored and distracted easily and when I’m bored I just can’t get into what I’m doing. I know it sounds immature, maybe, but I was wondering if anyone can kindly tell me what they think about this. Thanks.