Down to my last 300$ (my bills add up to about 700$ every month) and decided well I’m short anyway… I bought a 20$ lottery ticket and 4 5$ tickets which support the NY school system according to the last advert I’ve seen…I “won” 5$…. Which is fine but I don’t donate because of the many stories of singular people taking advantage of it… so I have more to the government hoping a kid can get a text book but I know they won’t…. The idea of me magically getting 400$ trumps a kid getting a text book…. I could straight up buy somebody a ridiculously priced book brand new… but I spent it on a lottery ticket in the hopes of paying my bills…I fucked up. I’m selling things I thought I owned but in the end the courts going to want money and all I really have is a tv and some musical instruments… whatever hobbies I thought I had are no longer existent because I started poor and am locked into being poor.