I am absolutely devastated of all the betrayal I have experienced at my job. Definitely looking for a new one.
I'm fucking 29 and due to circumstances I was not able to get a degree and can't get one now due to finances and personal time constraints. I am writing these motivation letters while i've never been more demotivated in my life, because “nobody speaks my language”, all of this emotional, professional mumbo jumbo, or overly motivated exaggerated bullshit ads…
Today I tried to be nice and ask my colleague what he's got planned during the weeking etc. on the meeting while we were waiting for others, but he just shot me down like “if nobody else joins the meeting in the next 2 minutes i'm leaving”.
I am really not a fucking whiner ever, I usually keep all my issues to myself, but god fucking dammit, I get the feeling everyone's a psychopath nowadays and everything's my fault when I just try so hard. I tried to ask for more work, tried so hard to get along with everyone despite our differences, but I feel like a plate of food in front a toddler, they don't even know what it is and push it away.
I'm a fucking loser – socially, financially, everything. None of the “friend candidate” people I met in these past 3 years stuck around either.
I should be writing another cover letter rn but I just can't. Some keep rejecting me within a day because “they decided to pursue other applicants” … it's supposed to be a fucking job shortage, then why can't I get a job? I was finally able to land an office job 3 yrs ago and thought everything will go swimmingly, but they just don't want to hire me full time for WHATEVER DAMN REASON which they don't even specify aside “we don't have enough FTEs” …… yeah sure, asshats had 5 billion profit last year, but can't afford a mediocre paying employee WHICH THEY NEED ANYWAY and HAS BEEN DOING A GOOD JOB.
Why the fuck can't I be a fucking cold hearted career snake bitch, why do I have to have emotions?