Hi Reddit, posting this on a throwaway because, frankly, I’m too ashamed to have this on my main account’s history (and I get enough bigoted comments already without fanning the flames).
Anyway I worked at a debt collection agency up until a few days ago and it’s just now hitting my how screwed up what happened to me is. I first got this job 4 years ago when I had basically no other options and I just needed a paycheck and initially it didn’t seem so bad. My boss was loud and rude but (seemingly) mostly harmless and his son (who as far as I could tell nobody liked) was clearly there only because of his dad. But it was tolerable enough and at least it was over at 5. At least until COVID hit.
During COVID many of us started working from home, which was a blessing at first, but soon became an even bigger hassle than working in the office because my boss became obsessed with monitoring everyone’s performance (probably because he could no longer bully us in person). Anyway myself and most of my coworkers ended up probably logging more hours at home than we ever did in the office and had the added stress of never being able to “get away from work” so to speak, as our boss now felt okay with calling us at all hours about whatever was bothering him.
So cut to two years later when he finally wrangles the last of us (read: me) back into the office and to cut a long story short, in the interim I finally started my transition (I’ve known I’m trans for at least as long as I’ve had the job but before COVID I never had the courage to wear or do the things I really enjoyed), so when I got back to the office I could tell it was a shock for some of my coworkers, most of all my boss. He acted like his usual self (brash and annoying) for a week or so before he started getting seriously misogynistic about the same time his son started misgendering me regularly, playing it off as an accident. Now keep in mind I had told everyone in the office that I didn’t expect them to be perfect, but as long as they showed an effort to call me she/her then that was enough. However, my boss’ son clearly was doing this on purpose and made no secret of it. All the while his dad was doing his best impression of a 1950s husband, calling me things like “broad” and “dame” ironically and telling me to cook him lunch or dinner (if we happened to be working late, which was happening more and more near the end of my employment). And just to be nice sometimes I would, though I realize now this was a mistake.
Regardless I hoped that if I just acted pleasantly to both of them then they would leave me alone but apparently just my presence was enough to provoke them. This came to a head when the son pretty seriously messed something up (won’t get into details) and asked for me to cover for him with his dad. Now normally I would have told him that it wasn’t my problem but he seemed very sincere and seemed like he just wanted to fix his mistake, so I did.
If I could go back in time I’d tell myself to not trust him but it’s too late for that. Long story short I caught the blame for his fuckup and I get fired and now I really have nowhere to go. My resume is basically empty and my boss definitely won’t give me a recommendation anywhere else. I feel trapped and I don’t know what to do.
Anyway there isn’t really a happy ending here, but I guess I just wanted some advice from you guys since it seems like you always know what to do in hopeless situations like this?