This is going to be a bit of a long post so bear with me. But Basically in late May of this year I found myself in a friends with benefits situation with one of my coworkers from the catering place I work at . Keep in mind that I am 22F and this coworker is a 32M and it was he who pursued me first.
This all started when he told me he liked me whilst giving him a ride home from work one day. I originally shot down his advances however decided later to give it a try. When I told him I changed my mind and was open to possibly going on a date he proceeded to ask for my number. I told him no he would have to wait a bit as I wanted to take things slow and was nervous due to the 10 year age gap.
He ignored my request and found my number through the 7shifts app and called me multiple times and texted me. Despite this obvious red flag I ignored it.
We started to hang out outside of work and everything seemed to be going well. Until one night when we went to a bar and the bouncer recognized him. The bouncer was obviously not a fan of his and an argument ensued. During the argument the bouncer said to him “Make sure you don't assault her”. This deeply disturbed me as I have a traumatic past with SA so I left him there and went home.
Somehow despite this incident he roped me back in with his excuses for why the bouncer said that. Claiming that the bouncers comment was in reference to his behavior during a schizophrenic episode.
As the summer went on I encountered more and more red flags of his and often would tell myself each time we hung out that it would be our last. Due to these red flags I was seeing.
I finally decided after several failed attempts to cut him off and that I would do so after going on a 10 day vacation.
However after I returned from my vacation I came back to work to find out that he was fired just the day before for sexually harassing younger female coworkers. I still am very much in the dark about what it is he specifically said/did to these coworkers. However as terrible as this situation is I was relieved that I no longer had to work with him.
I thought he would be so embarrassed from his firing that he would never reach out to me again. However today he did. I politely messaged him back asking him to never contact me again. I am scared though as he knows where I live and I feel like I do not know this man and what he is capable of.
Has anyone else had a situation like this? I am lost on ways to protect myself as he no longer works at my work so I feel I can't go to my employer with these concerns . The police would not be of help either as he has not done anything major yet. I am just trying to protect myself and plan ahead for if he does. Overall I just feel frustrated that it feels like there is no way to address this situation since he has already been terminated.