Sorry if there is poor grammer, I'm on mobile.
For context; I'm 34, I've been in my field for around 10 years, I'm really good at what I do, and I'm finding it hard to hold down a job.
In 2019, right before the start of COVID-19, I was fired from my job for time fraud. The situation basically boiled down to my badge not working, non-communication from HR, and my boss telling me to “guess” what time I came in on these days. Because my badge records didn't match my time records, I was let go.
Even with COVID-19 I was able to find 2 jobs in 2020. I was laid off from the first one and stayed at the second job (my job just prior to my current job) for 1.5 years. I was having some issues trusting my boss or really any authority figure at the last job. I worked really hard and ended up being the 2nd best “employee” on my team in almost all aspects of my job (that being my first full year). When I gave my notice, my badge was turned off and I was asked not to come back.
I took a paycut to accept my current role because it was the industry I want to be in… for the rest of my life (do what you love and all that).
However, after only 6 weeks, I have had some issues with my current boss. It seems she picks on me more than the others. My coworkers have corroborated this, one went so far as to ask my boss to please not treat either of us that way, ultimately defending me.
Now I'm starting to wonder if the problem is me, after having issues with 2 bosses in the past year. I don't have any issues with the tasks I'm assigned, but it seems like she always finds an issue with something I do (she's been that way to all of my female coworkers). If she finds anything is incorrect, she will literally say “guess I have to do everything myself” or she'll take it apart and stand over my shoulder finding anything she can to insult me over while I put it back together. She also often goes on rants when I'm the only one in the room with her and it often has nothing to do with me but I find myself internalizing it.
I just don't understand what the problem is. Am I just a pushover? I care about this job and I'm doing the best I can, but I find myself constantly apologizing whenever I see her come into a room. I've had issues standing up for myself in the workplace my whole life. How can I be politely assertive with my boss?
TL;DR : my boss is a jerk and I want to be more assertive