First of all it’s a silly request—too easy to fake a reference and who in their right mind would provide a reference who might not offer a glowing review.
That said, I’m not entirely comfortable lying. Chalk it up to a misplaced sense of morals—it just makes me nervous.
I struggle to provide reference because I’ve had pretty long tenure at my last three employers—almost ten years each. Most people I used to work with no longer work for those companies and because I’ve moved (across three states) I haven’t stayed in touch with many.
To add to the difficulty, I’m not generally a very social person. I have a very, very small circle of friends, but I do have a large family that takes up most of any time I might spend keeping up with former co-workers.
Is there any way around a reference request besides lying? (If I have to, I’ll do it and I’ll get over it, but it will leave me a nervous wreck for a while.)